Computer diagnosis...
One day, John complained to his friend, "My elbow really hurts. I guess I should see the doctor."
His friend said, "Don't do that. There's a computer at the pharmacy that can diagnose anything quicker and cheaper than a doctor.
Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about and it will only costs you £5.00."
John figured he had nothing to lose so he filled a jar with a urine sample and went to the pharmacy. Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the £5.00.
The computer started making some noise and various lights started flashing. After a brief pause, out popped a small slip of paper which read:
1. You have tennis elbow.
2. Soak your arm in warm water, avoid heavy labour.
3. It will be better in two weeks!
That evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if this computer could be fooled.
He decided to give it a try. He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, and urine samples from his wife and daughter. To top it off he masturbated into the concoction.
He went back to the pharmacy and located the computer - poured in the sample and deposited the £5.00. The machine again made the usual noises - flashed its lights and printed out the following analysis:
1. Your tap water is too hard - get a water softener.
2. Your dog has ring worm - bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo.
3. Your daughter is using cocaine. - put her in rehab.
4. Your wife is pregnant... twin girls - they are not yours - get a lawyer.
5. If you don't stop masturbating your elbow will never get better!!
His friend said, "Don't do that. There's a computer at the pharmacy that can diagnose anything quicker and cheaper than a doctor.
Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about and it will only costs you £5.00."
John figured he had nothing to lose so he filled a jar with a urine sample and went to the pharmacy. Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the £5.00.
The computer started making some noise and various lights started flashing. After a brief pause, out popped a small slip of paper which read:
1. You have tennis elbow.
2. Soak your arm in warm water, avoid heavy labour.
3. It will be better in two weeks!
That evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if this computer could be fooled.
He decided to give it a try. He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, and urine samples from his wife and daughter. To top it off he masturbated into the concoction.
He went back to the pharmacy and located the computer - poured in the sample and deposited the £5.00. The machine again made the usual noises - flashed its lights and printed out the following analysis:
1. Your tap water is too hard - get a water softener.
2. Your dog has ring worm - bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo.
3. Your daughter is using cocaine. - put her in rehab.
4. Your wife is pregnant... twin girls - they are not yours - get a lawyer.
5. If you don't stop masturbating your elbow will never get better!!
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