A man walked into the produce section...

A man walked into the produce section of his local supermarket and asked to buy half a head of lettuce. The boy working in that section told him that they only sold whole heads of lettuce. The man was insistent and told him to ask the manager about the matter. Walking into the back room the boy said to his manager, "Some old bastard wants to buy half a lettuce!" As he finished the sentence he turned to find the man standing right behind him, so he quickly added, "And this gentleman kindly offered to buy the other half."

The manager approved the deal and the man went on his way. Later that day the manager said to the boy, "I was impressed with the way you got yourself out of that situation earlier. We like people who can think on their feet. Where are you from, son?" "New Zealand, sir," replied the boy. "Well, why did you leave New Zealand?" asked the manager. "Sir, there's nothing but whores and rugby players there." "Really, my wife is from New Zealand." "Really, sir," replied the youngster. "Who did she play for?"