Scouser jokes...

Q. If you see a Scouser on a bicycle, why should you never swerve to hit him?

A: It might be your bicycle.

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Q: Why does the River Mersey run through Liverpool?

A: Because if it walked it would be mugged.

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Q: What do you call a Scouser in a three-bed semi?

A. A burglar.

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Q: What do you call a Scouser in a tie?

A. The accused.

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Q: Why wasn't Jesus born in Merseyside?

A: Because God couldn't find three wise men or a virgin.

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Q: What is the difference between a Scouser and a coconut?

A: One's thick and hairy, and the other's a coconut.

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Q: What do you say to a scouser in a uniform?

A: Big Mac and fries please.

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Q: What's the first question at a Liverpool pub quiz night?

A: What you looking at?

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Q: What do you call a scouser in a white shell suit

A: The bride.